Conklin's Blueprints by Brooke Page

in his, he brought it up to his face so the back of my hand was touching his cheek.  He sighed in contentment and leaned into my hand.  His eyes relaxed, the tension leaving his face.  Was he nervous for my touch?  He seemed so sensitive to it.  The contact felt so intimate, all I wanted to do was push my body up against him and wrap my arms around his waist.  His chest looked so comforting.  But I couldn’t gain the courage to snuggle up against him.
    He opened his eyes and gazed at me.  Tyler’s soft eyes were all the encouragement I needed.  I started to move my hand to his waist and lifted my chin while closing my eyes.  He grasped my hand before it found his waist.  I sucked in a breath of air, startled by his sudden movement.  Before I could breathe out his mouth was on mine.
    Any tension in my body evaporated once his lips were on mine.  Tyler had my hands in a vice grip as he deepened the kiss.  His tongue caressed mine, causing me to melt into his chest.  I wanted his arms wrapped around me.  I wanted to run my hands through his hair, but he held them pinned against my sides.  He let out a soft groan into my mouth when I pushed forward, opening my mouth wider, urging his tongue to dance closer with mine.  His hands squeezed our interlaced fingers, pulling them up so our elbows were bent, bringing one hand back to the side of his face as our tongues kept exploring one another.  Man, did he know how to kiss intimately.  My body was starting to rev up, and the small voice in my head inviting him back to my hotel room was becoming louder and louder.
    But then, he suddenly jerked back, dropping my hands.  His head whipped towards the hotel.  I tried to gain my composure, my head still spinning from the bluntness of his kiss.  When I finally came back to reality, I followed his head to the hotel.  Someone was sitting on a pool chair talking on the phone.  It wasn’t anyone I recognized.
    Tyler shook his head, looking utterly torn.  “I um… I should get back to my room and get to bed.”
    I didn’t know what to say.  How could he turn himself off so fast like that?  I felt denied.  Did he regret kissing me? 
    “Yeah, I’m pretty tired.  Have a good night,” I murmured, sliding past him, bolting for the stairs fighting back tears, feeling shot down. 
    “Becca, wait!” Tyler yelled, following me in the stairwell.  I stopped midway up the stairs, refusing to turn and show him my tears.  I felt his breath behind me on my neck.  I imagined his lips just below my ear.  My breath got shaky from the thought.
    “Can I walk you to your room?” He sounded flustered.  I didn’t say anything, afraid my voice would give away how he had gotten to me.  He gently took my hand and led me up the stairs as I kept my eyes on the ground.
    Before we walked through the door to the hallway Tyler scanned the space in front of us.  Gripping my hand even tighter, he led the way to my hotel room door.  Once in front of my room, I bravely peeked up at him.  He looked so scared again.  It made my heart hurt.
    He sighed, “Have a good night, Becca.”
    I nodded and opened my door to walk in. Before he could say anything else, I closed the door with him standing in the hallway looking at his feet.  I locked the door and threw myself on the bed and the dam broke.
    I felt used again.  He had only kissed me, but the intimacy of the kiss was so much more.  Why did he cower away so quickly?  It had to affect him, at least a little bit.  The intensity of his kiss was too much for it not to have.   I turned my phone to silent and cried myself to sleep.
     
     
     
     

Chapter 6
     
    My eyes opened to the sound of the radio alarm in the hotel room.  Rubbing my eyes, I tried to adjust my sight to the light, but my vision was blurry from crying myself to sleep.  How stupid was I?  I never should have gone on a walk with him, and I never should have reached for his hand.  I started this mess.  And