The Palms by S Celi

get away from all of it.” A rueful half smile crossed his face. “And my family didn’t object. I think they wanted me gone, too.” Trent rubbed his face with his hand. In one way, telling her the truth felt freeing, as if he’d finally unburdened the pain he’d carried on his back for years. In another way, telling the truth revived a grief he’d never wanted to face again. At that moment, he didn’t know how to sort it out inside of himself.
    “Okay. I should have told you earlier today. I should have just told you the whole truth.” He hesitated. “But admitting it all seemed so horrible. Just didn’t know what you would think.”
    Lauren crossed her arms again, but she did it without animosity or anger. “It is horrible.”
    “I’ve carried the guilt about Cynthia’s death around for years.” Trent shuddered and his voice fell to a whisper. “I blamed myself. She wouldn’t have been in that position if she hadn’t met me. She’d still be alive.”
    “But she isn’t.” Lauren studied Trent’s face; she saw pain and regret. “You have to forgive yourself. And you need to move on.”
    “How can I?”
    He closed his eyes and leaned back further against the concrete. As he did, some of the street light caught his face. It made his square jaw look stronger and the slight stubble on his face more pronounced. Lauren stifled a gasp. She wanted to stay mad at him, she really did, but when she saw his gorgeous features like that...
    “There was no way I would have even tried to contact you,” Trent continued. “Not after something like that.” He pulled his eyes to hers. “I’ve been down the road to hell. I have lived in hell. And I didn’t deserve someone like you.”
    “But you don’t even really know me anymore.”
    “You keep on saying that.” Tentatively, Trent took her hand and lifted it to his lips. “I know enough to know I want to try again. I want to get to know you again.” He waited for an answer, wondering how much he’d continue to beg her. She had to see how much he wanted to try. How much he hoped she would.
    “It’s not what happened that bothers me, Trent. It’s the lying.” She gestured with her left hand to help make her point. “I just want to you to tell me the truth. If we don’t have the truth, we don’t have anything.”
    “I was afraid. I’ll admit that.”
    “I’m not going to be with someone who can’t tell me the whole truth.”
    “Can’t you see? I’m doing just that.” He hesitated. “I’ve told you everything. I promise. Everything.”
    She pulled herself away from the concrete and took a step to him. As she did, her heart broke — not from pain, but from sympathy. “What do you really want from me, Trent?”
    “That’s the second time you’ve asked that question tonight,” he observed.
    “Maybe that’s because I really want to know.” She frowned a little. “I mean, can people really have a second chance?”
    “They can. We can.” His hand pinched the bridge of his nose. “This is that moment, Lauren. One more chance to make things different. Make things right. Make it count.”
    “But that doesn’t mean—”
    “Lauren, people wish for a chance like this all the time, and they never get it. We have one. Let’s not waste it.”
    She considered his words. “But like I said, I’m not the same girl you left.”
    “I know you’re not,” he said. “You’re better.”
    She took another step to him, and when she did, he took a leap and linked his other hand with hers. She looked down at them as she considered things. “You know,” she finally said. “I’m glad I know what happened. I always wondered.”
    He pulled her little closer. “Will you give me a second chance? Maybe it’s not a second chance. More like a third.” He laughed a little. “Forgiveness. It’s one of the best things about life.”
    She answered with a half-smile. “Yes, it is.”
    He leaned forward, almost daring not to breathe. They were on the